T-minus 4 Months | Fears, Preparations & Giddy-ness Galore

I finally bought my ticket home (to Orlando).

My official last day in NYC is December 26th 2017. 

I’ve said that aloud probably a million times and it still feels unreal. But the ticket confirmation is chillin’ right there in my email inbox. The points I used from my credit card have been deducted. It must be true.

I even made my packing list and figured out how much I’ll actually spend before leaving. Curious about how I saved enough $$? Checkout my first post about that here.

I’m all about planning out every last detail to make sure I’ve thought of everything before it has a chance to go wrong. I’m a firm believer in to-do lists and productivity protocols, but right now I’m about as plan-less as you can get.

Well, sort of.

What I have planned so far for my trip to Southeast Asia:

– My fly out date (February 11th)

– My First & Second stop: Taipei (2-3 weeks) and then onto Bangkok for ?

That’s it. Those are the only *real plans that I have. These are the only real plans I intend to have and it’s making my head want to explode. 

I plan most days with an hourly (sometimes by the minute) schedule. It works for me. It helps me get everything I want from a day’s time… but it also gives me a freaking headache.

I want to know what it’s like to go 365 without planning my every move. I want to know what it’s like to have zero blue where I’ll be or what I’ll be doing a week from now. That kind of unknown is terrifying to someone like me.

So why do it?

Because I’ll never grow or develop as a person without stepping out of my comfort zone. Also because it’s going to be SO. MUCH. FUN.

Am I afraid? Hell to the yes. 

What am I afraid of?

Getting sick (my stomach is hella sensitive)
Getting lost in an unknown country (I don’t speak a lick of any of the languages)
Getting hurt (I’m going to have to learn to ride a motor bike…)
Getting dirty (gahh I can already feel the grime of those hostel beds. ew)
Getting covered in bugs (I have a crazy phobia of anything resembling a roach)
Getting tired & giving up (do I have it in me? Am I going to fail hardcore?)

These are my fears (6 out of 6 million). I’m excited to see how I face them.

So this trip, although full of fun and excitement and laziness (at times) is more to me than just a break from life. It’s more than just spontaneity… This is my way of creating parts of the person I’d like to become.

I want to create a version of myself that seeks out opportunity more aggressively & without pause for planning.

I want to create a version of myself with a quicker reaction time & an ability to stay present without thinking about the next ‘to-do’ item.

I want to create a version of myself whose instincts are spidey-sense level in *very stressful environments.

I want to create a version of myself that has more confidence in her own skills and abilities to face fears and obstacles.

With allllll of that said (I really like to ramble) I am beyond excited. Like head-spinning-every-time-I-think-about-this excited.

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